i’ve recently been introduced to the idea of dopamine dressing; of allowing our clothes to spark joy in our hearts. i’ve been obsessed with clothing from the time i was a small being standing in my mums closet, so many textures! colors! shapes! my little eyes couldn’t get enough of the way silhouettes drape the models in vogue and the ideas that were stitched into seams.
clothing was never just fabric, it was a story. first, it was a costume. then, it was armor. then, it was truth. so how do we write the story in the first place? how do we get high, wield the armor, live the truth?
i think so often people pretend that fabric is passive, that is it not language spoken before words. there exists a silent power in saying, with color and silhouette, what the body already knows: today–i will take up space. today–i am untouchable. today i am here–i am soft, i am electric, i am full to the brim with humanity. and the world listens. a barista lingers in the trade of coffee, struck by the cobalt of a sweater. a stranger on the subway rolls their shoulders back, quietly commanded by pressed lapels. we are ripples in the air, shaping the way people move with only the language of our hearts sewn to sleeves.
we start there, with the courage and insight to listen to your own being. though the way we dress is, to me, our most wonderful form of self expression to the world. i think the truest key to dopamine dressing is to choose your outfit only for yourself. before the world answers, before anyone else notices, before the first word is spoken–choose how to see yourself.
somewhere along the way we’ve all been spoon fed “should”. what suits a body type, a gender, an age. what is flattering, what is on trend, what is appropriate. i guess the greatest high is the soft shaking of the should. dopamine dressing is choosing something simply because it feels like you in the moment. i find myself in a performative confidence, when i stand before my closet and simply give permission–to exist as i am in fabric that feels like love, in color that doesn’t ask for approval, in shapes that instagram says is for a different body type. i get high on the finger in the air to “should”.
on the days i peel myself from bed with great effort, ignore the mirror as i brush my teeth. i allow my fingers to trace the shirt that fits like a secret, i contemplate the shape of a hemline, and something shifts. a tilt of the chin, a newly tuned cadence. maybe then, the confidence is a bit less performative as i let seams hug what i have a harder time admiring. button yourself up with grace, with a tender love for the body that carries you.
some days, the fabric holds memory i crave revisiting. i allow myself to be held by the worn softness of a sweatshirt wrapped around grief. i bask in a sundress that still smells like salt and
laughter. i layer the jacket weighted by the version of myself i am still learning to grow into. keep these pieces and remember, clothes are not just things we wear but something that wears us back. allow reverberations of the days you’ve lived, the people you’ve been.
i once caught my own reflection in a shop’s window and audibly laughed for the next block; i was in a trench coat laid atop cuffed pants and a half tucked long flannel, strolling in untied 1460’s. all morning i had been listening to a playlist i titled “directed by john hughes” (absolute 80’s bangers, of course) and sure enough, i looked like john bender. moral of the story: let it all inspire you! seriously, the vibrance at the farmers market, the music you’re sharing with friends, the person at the bookstore, hell, the books themselves! take it all in, feel what its saying, and reply in the language of sewn fabric.
the introduction to a cookbook i quite like says to make the recipe as its written once. then, when you return to it, make it your own. i believe this can be applied to garments all the same. make pieces say what you want them to say. that shirt that’s just long enough to make you feel odd? hem it. the hat just calling for a pin? stick it. while i quite love the simplicity of throwing a few favorite pieces together and just wearing clothes; i also love inviting the playfulness of wearing something in a way it “wasn’t meant to be.” perhaps its your favorite scarf tied into a shirt, or patterns that “clash” but feel good in your heart. forget about rules, just have fun! wear every necklace you own if it feels as good as a joint after work ;)
at the end of the day, it can just be fabric and seams and screen printed ink. or, you can allow it’s meaning to shine. you can hold a crafted garment in your hands each morning and decide–this is who i am today, this is what i want to say. adorning your body in it is an act of becoming. with every lace tied and button fastened, we are offering ourselves a moment of knowing. so let it be fun! let it be messy! let it be a love letter to each version of yourself. there’s no right way to wear yourself–only the way that gets you high.
